Monday, July 13, 2009 @ 8:24 PM
Have you any idea how Hell would look like?
I think I've tasted 20% of it.
Expected.
Attachement started.
First day.. second day..
The Tigeress started to Roar.
Embarrassment infront of public, corridors of the ward and those teaceher who loved me just e second day for her false accusation or u call it assumption.
Tong tong also have. My face is thrown down to the drain already.
She is not to be provoked. Or else u have no good xia chang.
It's a very stressful week till I broke down in tears in front of some when I shared or kena scolded.
Couldn't take it already. It's tough.
Makes me feel so useless and stupid being under her.
Thanks to those who encouraged me so0 much. [Tracy gal, Da jIe, Rachel, Jaime.... ]
It was much needed at that point.
She degrades me like anything.
Just becoz my GPA is good. Just one week she determine my A is gone. thanks
I dun go there becoz i'm blinded by all my skills and wanting to get A.
It's a privilege to get A, not that I deserve it.
Yes so what if i'm no good in my skills.
Don't tear my confidence.
Not being able to perform well under you is because of the pressure u're enforcing on me.
Theory good doesn't mean my practical is tt great.
She don't seems to get it.
Everything or actions seems to be stupid and no logic to her.
I'm really praying very Hard enough. Not tt I never pray.
I'm trying to be tolerant to all this.
Even she is showing favouritism or even trying to make me feel bad by praising my other friend.
This is driving nuts for NUTS. What could I do.. I just needed to shut up and acknowledge it.
This has alwasy been Jasmine "fault".
Life is always about accepting the blame even though it's not mine. :/
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Well.. God reminded me. In good or bad times rejoice.
So i shouldn't be like tt. But well i just need to vent it off.
My heart is palpitating everyday, be it morning or night.
Hoping tt friday night will just come quickly now.
It's that bad already.
I envy those who are under teacher's tt seems to be a little more concern in the areas of the heart.
I guess.. this is a GREAT testing God is putting me through.
Trying to still put on a christlike attittude.
But i'm being very very patient to accept all this !*&#^.
Life with her is not what you would u pray for. Even I pity her children.
She may be nice but... Her PMS is everyday. it's swings quite fast.
4 more days.. probably live would be easier for 3 weeks at IMH.
Thank God for his word tt reminded me..
"Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you.
Not as the world give I unto you.
Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid." John 14:27.
That's my prayer everyday, whenever I get demoralise badly.
I'm already a demoralise kid. I think this made it worse.
Great. Thanks.
In addition, the world is ugly, it is not until u step into the working world.
People are wearing two mask.
People aren't really that helpful and can surely be a threat to you.
What's the use of learning certain subjects in school last time and not applying it?
Sin is really a great temptation. That you would rather continue to play this game.
"Welcome to life!" :/
Hopefully the next post would be better.
Sorry for the runtings.. I know this is not right or nice but well.. just let this be here. Thanks.
Please pray for me.
Hopefully I dun get crazy before I enter IMH.
I might just need a bed there, ready for me if my brain nerve burst.